A Lesson

Every so often I’ll get an email from a student somewhere in the world with questions for a project they’re working on. (What inspired me to approach something a certain way, the technical process behind an image, etc.) Sometimes I notice an uptick in website traffic from specific locations (suddenly a spike coming out of Melbourne, etc.). When that happens, I usually Google myself to see if something has been published without my knowing. I’ve had some bizarre experiences that keep me on my toes now (like having no clue I’d won an international award since the notifications were sent to spam…twice!).

But it wasn’t until recently that I thought to search for myself on YouTube. This time around, I was scouring through old footage from speaking events to use for a portfolio. Then I stumbled upon this: a remote lecture created during the pandemic by Cory Merchant in the suburbs of New York. It’s the first time I’ve actually been able to hear the context in which my art has been referenced in a classroom setting (besides speaking to students directly).

And, while it’s a simple thing, I found myself deeply moved by his response to a body of work that came from such a vulnerable, personal place. (I may have shed a few tears.) There were moments I wanted to chime in and clarify (don’t worry, I didn’t destroy the originals or the obsession was brief, during a single delusion), but most of the time I found myself feeling oddly comforted, as if this teacher were holding the work (my lived experience) as gently as one would a delicate nest woven with grass.

I wanted to pin this here in my Journal, so when there are those days I question if I should even be sharing some of my more personal reflections in a public space, that I can feel reassured that someone out there may connect or relate or find a sense of healing in some unexpected way.